


Five Times Crowley surprises his angel, and Once the angel surprises him

by Glitchwitch_cos



Series: Glitch's Good Omens [1]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: 5 Things, 5+1, Aziraphale is Bad at Feelings (Good Omens), Based on headcanons, Crowley drags his s sounds, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, bc snake eyes, crowley has the demon form of dyslexia, really terrible, the boys are back at it again, they're dumbasses, they're soft, true dumbassery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-06
Updated: 2019-07-10
Packaged: 2020-06-23 16:55:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19705558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glitchwitch_cos/pseuds/Glitchwitch_cos
Summary: 5+1, the list will be updated as it's written.1. Crowley drags his S sounds, Az makes fun of him. (Inspo @femmeaziraphale on tumblr)2. Crowley's eyes don't work like humans' do. Well, there's only one solution. (inspo @fightmelikeagirl on tumblr)3. ??4. ??5. ??+1. ??





	1. Snake Speak

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Good Omens fic, and my first 5+1 fic. Hope y'all enjoy these short fluffy blurbs.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aziraphale makes fun of Crowley, and is mortified to find out that this is the one thing he wouldn't want to make fun of.

Crowley was peculiar. Always had been, in Aziraphale’s opinion. He walked like legs were unnecessary, spoke without thought to who was around him, and always managed to help Aziraphale, no matter what. And he was a bloody drama queen, on top of it all. So of course, once the angel had noticed Crowley’s odd habit of dragging out his s sounds, he’d poked a bit of fun at the demon.

Crowley always took it in good humour, laughing along with the angel, even flicking a thin, forked tongue between short fangs every now and again.

Well, they were eating at some “dumb, upscale, French-bourgeoisie restaurant” as Crowley had put it, and said demon was ordering crepes for them.

“The bookworm will take the chocolate and ssstrawberry crepe, yess to the powdered ssugar. I’ll do the ssame, but no sssugar on top. Makesss me sssneeze.” He winks at the young girl taking their order, and she blushes while scurrying away to hand it off.

Aziraphale laughs, and says, “C’mon Crowley, no need to sound so ssslithery. You’ll scare the poor girl. You’re only-”

Crowley cuts him off with a deadpan look. “I have a ssspeech impediment, angel. Unless I’m really focusing-” He makes a face of intense concentration as he says that last word, to make his point, “My tongue generally is more snake than human.”

Aziraphale is absolutely  _ mortified _ . “Oh lord, I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize! I’ve been so mean!!”

Crowley laughs, absolutely out of place in the fancy marble restaurant with its quietly fancy patrons, and he says, “I thought you knew!! And it’s not like it’s a big deal, I always found the jokes funny.”

But Aziraphale keeps muttering, “I thought it was a choice! Oh dear lord, I’ve been an absolute bastard!!”

Crowley won’t stop laughing at him for weeks, but it’s enough for Aziraphale to know his demon isn’t truly offended.


	2. Snake eyes aren’t exactly meant for Shakespeare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (inspo @fightmelikeagirl on tumblr) Crowley has a bit of trouble reading, not because he doesn't understand it, but because his eyes aren't made for it.

Crowley and Aziraphale spend quite a lot of time in the angel’s cluttered little bookshop, cleaning - really just moving books around to make more room for more books - and scaring away anyone who’d really want to buy any of Aziraphale’s books. 

Aziraphale’d never really seen Crowley read before. He knows that the demon  _ does _ read, seeing as he understands all the references to classic books he uses, but he’s never seen it.

At least, until a dreary day - which okay, isn’t uncommon, really, for London - but this time it’s the thirteenth day in a row and the lack of sunlight has been taking its toll on the cold-blooded demon. Usually, a good lamp and wrapping himself around his angel in snake-form is enough for Crowley to keep enough energy up during stretches of rainy, cold days, but unfortunately, it’s been just a bit too long.

Crowley perches as far away from the cold windows and drafty door as he possibly can, trying to stay warm despite the broken-three-hundred-years-ago-and-never-fixed AC, wrapped in one of Aziraphale’s fluffy blankets, reading A Midsummer Night’s Dream, as Aziraphale totters around, shifting books, dusting his antique tables.

In his tired haze, Crowley doesn’t have the mind to stop himself from sounding out the words aloud, trying to tame the words that swam on the pale pages.

He’s squinting down at his fiftieth page and sounding out some idiotic word when Aziraphale appears in front of him, gently prising the book from Crowley’s black-painted fingers. 

“Having some trouble, demon?” Aziraphale gently says, not making fun, not really, - He doesn’t make jokes at the demons expense often, he’s too kind to the demon for that, this is more asking permission to help.

Crowley, not having the energy to argue, nor the judgment to say no, quietly says, “Snake eyes are for catching mice, not for Shakespeare, angel.”

The angel in question huffs a laugh. He shifts Crowley to the side so he can sit beside the sleepy demon. Crowley doesn’t speak or resist, simply moving to accommodate the other, curling around him.

Aziraphale reads aloud. His quiet voice floats through the shop as he works through A Midsummer Night’s Dream. And Crowley listens. 

It becomes a tradition for them. After dinner, when the shop was closed, and the sun was setting, they’d find a place to settle, and Aziraphale reads through whichever book they chose, gentle and quiet. Occasionally, when it was a weekend or a holiday, Adam or Anathema and Newton, or sometimes even Madame Tracy and Sergeant Shadwell would join them, listening to the latest book in their endeavor. 

They never spoke. When Aziraphale read, it was like a completely different world had fallen over them. An unspoken, but an understood rule all the same, you were quiet until Aziraphale had finished whatever section he was going to finish, and on the other side, Aziraphale didn’t stop until he was done.

Aziraphale breaks the rule. He doesn’t mean to. But they’re reading through a wonderful series about a young boy who discovers magic and the wars that come along with it, and Crowley’s eyes are slowly closing due to lack of sun time, and oh, Aziraphale can’t really help but stop mid-sentence and place a gentle kiss on the demon’s forehead.

There’s a moment of stillness before a very confused and startled snake takes the place of a very confused and startled Crowley.

“Oh, my dear boy, I’m sorry, I didn’t quite think that through.” Aziraphale reaches over to run his hand over sleek black scales, and the snake wraps around his fingers in apology.

  
After twenty minutes of coaxing Crowley back into a humanoid shape, and another twenty of talking, the bookshop becomes a home for them, more than it had been before, simply because now it was _theirs._


End file.
